Wednesday, December 26, 2007

The Mad Soviet Bureaucracy at Wikipedia


I have done some searching since my last post and the link in the title may suggest that Comrade Durova is in fact no more than a latter day Joan of Ark being conveniently burnt at the stake in the interests of others.

That probably is true but then Joan of Ark was still a crazed religious lunatic. Comrade Duroza is only a crazed wikipedia fanatic. We have not yet learned to deal with her like.

Comrade Durova may even have resigned but persists in maintaing a way back in to the delusional hierarchy that has abandoned her. This is not untypical of devotees who lack any sense of bearing outside the original group that gave them strength. Christians, Moonies, Scientologists, Islamists, Clausists etc.

Reading the headline link page (and there are a hell of a lot more wikipedia pages like this) is akin to reading the annals of state trials involving inquisitors and torturers. Of course, there is also the hapless victim. But the victim is no more than an inmate of Lubyanka who would kiss her gaoler's bottoms if they allowed her back into the party and she could treat others to the same kind of "justice".

These are mad people. Tread warily.

If any of them acquires real power, hide in a nuclear proof bunker immediately. If you cannot find one, as you will not, fight back now or be ready to blow your head off.

The Apparatchik Durova, Wikipedia and the Suppression of Dissent in the New Soviet Internet Empire by Imperator Jimbo Wales


NB: There is a link to the entertaining video relating to this dispute at the bottom and unlike some other links, should play full screen.

The arch-fiend of the secret society running wikipedia access even calls herself "Durova". She appears by her actions to be a natural born censor and to draw satisfaction from the abuse of power involved in controlling non-members of the elite by, for instance, banning them from editing wikipedia on the basis of secret evidence which, when dragged out of her (she all the while kicking and screaming), turns out not only not to support her case against the offender but to vindicate him. It then turns out that wikipedia administrators maintain a secret list of those forming an elite within the elite who communicate with each other so that they can act collectively to enforce super-elite decisions that no-one else will be allowed to question because of their power.




Her namesake appears much more friendly, sensible, organised, used to putting down despots, capable of civilised conversation, capable of fighting in the Napoleonic Wars, capable of becoming a stabs-rostmistr, writing fiction and non-fiction and...er...generally achieving things in the big world. Nadezhda Durova was also, of course, a woman and may have been Comrade Durova's role model. Whether the pupil came up to the mark is, of course, another question.


You should first look at an interview with Durova on You Tube to form an impression of her. But do not a lot of dangerous subverters of freedom often appear meek and unthreatening? May it be a question of an otherwise powerless person of no great intelligence finding by chance access to power in an immensely powerful system and thus acquiring for themselves power over more gifted people? People she would otherwise never been able to emulate? People she can now grind under her heel and, by doing so, assuage her inferiority complex? A wikipedia administrator position is said to be unpaid and probably requires an immense devotion of time and energy. It will therefore attract those motivated by altruism and a genuine belief in the concept (as charities do) but it will also attract power hungry despots who lack the skills to succeed elsewhere (as, er..., charities also do).

An overview of the story so far can be viewed at The Register.

Continuing events will no doubt be recorded at The Wikipedia Review and, more particularly, on the forums devoted to Comrade Durova.

For the avoidance of doubt, there is no implication by the use of the word "comrade" that Comrade Durova is a communist. I doubt if anyone cares what her political views are and that may be part of the problem. Being unimportant because they have no talent often seems to lead people to derive gratification from the exercise of petty power over overs. Unfortunately, controlling the content of wikipedia is not petty power - it is now too big for that. The important point is that Comrade Durova is an enemy of freedom.

I have called her an apparatchik. Let us see how wikipedia defines this:

Apparatchik (Russian: аппара́тчик, pronounced [ʌpʌˈraʨɪk] plural apparatchiki) is a Russian colloquial term for a full-time, professional functionary of the Communist Party or government; i.e., an agent of the governmental or party "apparat" (apparatus) that held any position of bureaucratic or political responsibility, with the exception of the higher ranks of management.

Members of the "apparat" were frequently transferred between different areas of responsibility, usually with little or no actual training for their new areas of responsibility. Thus, the term apparatchik, or "agent of the apparatus" was usually the best possible description of the person's profession and occupation.

The term was usually associated with a specific mindset, attitude and appearance of the person; when used by "outsiders", it often bore derogatory connotations.

Today this term is also used in contexts other than Soviet Union. For example, it is often used to describe people who cause bureaucratic bottlenecks in otherwise efficient organizations, especially at support services groups (such as IT services). It is also frequently used to describe individuals appointed to positions in any government on the basis of ideological or political loyalty rather than competence.

Most of this seems to apply to Comrade Durova and it will be noted that the definition applies to members of any government, not just communist ones.

The ideological loyalty here is not to a political creed but to the dominance of wikipedia as a provider of information - not as a provider of correct unbiased information. The organisation has taken over and become an end in itself.

This is where the story becomes really scarey. The Emperor has abandoned the founding ideals and his not very imperial name of Jimbo Wales seems to match his new role as a loose cannon in the wild west.

As you will see from the links above and the video below (which is partisan but fun) Emperor Jimbo not only supported Comrade Durova but threatened those who tried to expose her and continued to do so even when her humiliating public exposure as someone to whom the phrase "free speech" described an alien concept unknown on this planet was complete.

Since this concept was fundamental to the vision behind wikipedia and everyone (at the start) believed him, his trahison des clercs is not excused by the fact that Comrade Durova remains a mere apparatchik and failed in her bid for higher office.

You must view the video. You will need Flash 9.

Questions:

When she chose the name Durova was it a conscious decision to emulate those who sought power in the Soviet empire as an "agent of the apparatus" on the basis of "loyalty rather than competence"?

When Imperator Jimbo supported her, was it because of her loyalty, her competence or merely because she (unpaid) was a useful agent of the appaatus?

Tuesday, December 25, 2007

A Christmas Card for You


The Canadian Supreme Court look a fun bunch especially if any of the gossip in the title link is true! Go there, it's a fun site.

Why God invented lawyers and other tales

Greetings!

Please accept without obligation, express or implied, these best wishes for an environmentally safe, socially responsible, low stress, non addictive, and gender neutral celebration of the winter solstice holiday as practiced within the most enjoyable traditions of the religious persuasion of your choice (but with respect for the religious or secular persuasions and/or traditions of others, or for their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all) and further for a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling, and medically uncomplicated onset of the generally accepted calendar year (including, but not limited to, the Christian calendar, but not without due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures). The preceding wishes are extended without regard to the race, creed, color, age, physical ability, religious faith, choice of computer platform, or sexual preference of the wishee(s).

Sandwiches

Two lawyers went into a cafe and ordered two drinks. Then they produced sandwiches from their briefcases and started to eat. The owner became quite concerned and marched over and told them, “You can’t eat your own sandwiches in here!” The attorneys looked at each other, shrugged their shoulders and then exchanged sandwiches.

Coca Cola

Click the title to read and watch and hear the coke joke.

Test

Test blog. My ISP had reset my ftp password so I could not publish the next few blogs on the date they were written. They automatically appeared when changed the password in blogger to connect properly to my website. Explanation over.

Wednesday, December 05, 2007

Ultimate Proof that Religion is Nonsense

The Moon wedding ceremony? Give me a break. If this does not prove that religion is simply a collection of absurd cults what does? People can be persuaded to believe anything. Search google.

Monday, December 03, 2007

The Cinzano Kid

This is amusing. Click on the title to view other Leonard Rossiter clips.

Thursday, November 29, 2007

Rename Your Teddy Now

Some Muslims wanted to kill her. Presumably by stoning her to death or inflicting a prolonged lashing.

Our politicians go out of their way to not offend the believers in such practices.

These are people we should offend. Immediately rename your teddy bear.

I suppose 15 days in a Sudan hellhole for renaming (after a child - not the prophet -and upon the childrens' democratic direction) a teddy is considered relatively mild by their standards!

Those are not standards we should aspire to.

Wednesday, November 28, 2007

The Oxford Protest Against Freedom: A Damp Squib



Libby Purves said everything necessary in her article in The Times yesterday. I will not repeat it. Just click on the title to go there.

Matthew Shearman also wrote a nice letter:

http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/comment/letters/article2956695.ece

The simple truth is that these students at Oxford University who have no respect for ancient freedoms or for free speech are uneducated barbarians. They spit. They squeak. They hurl abuse. They say that supporters of free speech are fascists. They
do not deserve to graduate.

Why? They have no rational arguments to advance. They are just thugs.

Ooops, how will they earn a living? Their juvenile (indeed, infantile) views do not qualify them to work in a free society.

Only kidding. Hopefully, they will grow out of their fascist tendencies.

My daughter has recently graduated from Oxford. She is not anti free speech. I do not therfore blame Oxford University. But I find it extraordinary that any University can permit attempts by any of its members (students or faculty) to attack (by violent or intimidatory methods) the sole and only purpose of its existence and not be called to account.

That purpose is to encourage informed debate and understanding based on factually accurate research and scholarship. Or, have I missed something?

The wanted posters are above. They are idiots who hold delusional beliefs. So what? Free speech is more important than they are.

Monday, November 26, 2007

The Idiots Have Taken Over The Asylum

Oh well, this was entirely predictable.

The enemies of freedom have massed at the Oxford Union and are jumping barriers.

They do so in the name of freedom.

Do they not realise that they are imbeciles?

Continued Failure to Update

No excuses. I am busy and lazy at the same time.

I will update later. The editor of the Jewish Chronicle is now on air.

The Oxford Union, Griffin, Irving and Free Speech


Juvenile posturing? Maybe. A decision I may not have made? Probably. A decision the Oxford Union was entitled to make? Certainly.

It would come as no surprise to regular readers of this blog (if there were any, which there are not - as to which see next blog) that I regard free speech as an absolute. Give it up and you have participated in the destruction of civilization or, at the very least, you have rendered the society in which you currently live one that is fit only for slaves.

The reasoning is simple. You concur in the suppression of views which you entirely justifiably despise and one day others will believe it justifiable to suppress a view that you hold dear.

The protestors (on screen as I type) are therefore foolish and are, further, providing hostages to fortune. Their views may in years to come be suppressed by similar haters of liberty.


Sunday, November 18, 2007

Eliza Manningham-Buller Says the Stones are Sexy


EMB has stated on Desert Island Discs this morning that she prefers rhe Rolling Stones to the Beatles because they are sexier. The revelation of this state secret (coming from our former head of security services) will no doubt have a major impact on the McCartney-Mills divorce settlement. Run and hide, Paul!

Tuesday, October 30, 2007

Jewish Law


I watched the Sky Three documentary on
Jewish
Law tonight. It was accepted by rabbis that the justification for certain jewish laws had long ago disappeared but some of them argued that observance was still required because it was the word of god. Pardon!

Some of the laws are utilitarian and would benefit us all if we compied with them. For instance, the thorough spring clean required every year. But when this is combined with the requirement that you eradicate all trace of leavened or fermented items from your residence it becomes absurd. One of the participants kept a special oven for use on one single day per year. Another hid leavened bead around the house to make sure thc hildren followed the law. It was a great game for the children and revealed a lot of humanity but it was humanity in the face of an absurd law.

Service Resumed

Service is now resumed. Lethargy and lack of any comments have been the main reasons for the break but the other reason is that I have not been able to reconnect to my main website and subsidiary to that is the fact that I have not wanted to publicise the blog until the main site was working correctly. Maybe that is the reason I receive no comments!

Monday, August 20, 2007

Philip Lawrence's Killer is Still Mad


Some mad fool will kill him. His desire to stay in this country is infantile and very stupid.

Does he not realise (however reformed he may be) that there are unreformed people out there who will seek revenge?

Tuesday, August 14, 2007

Harrods and the Harrodian School


This is an old case, just made available on the internet, but perhaps typifies the litigious nature of Harrods under current management:

How many other stores can sell you an elephant? Buy your stocks and shares? Arrange a safari in Africa? Engage a Black Watch piper for Hogmanay? Insure your life? Paint your portrait? Find you a house? Clean your silver? Give messages to your friends? Find a school for your child? Decorate your home? Send you on honeymoon?
"Find a school for your child" not run a school to educate your child.

Thus Harrods sued the Harrodian school for trading on its reputation and causing it loss which would sound in damages (and probably close the school).

Harrods lost at first instance, but they appealed. Ridiculous is one of the adjectives that springs to mind.

Yet the really surprising thing is that they only lost the appeal on a 2-1 majority.

Lord Justice Millet got it right. Pay careful attention to the the laconic final sentence of the following paragraph from his judgment:

Over the years Harrods has offered a vast range of services. These include a bank (established in 1890) which carries on business under the name "The Harrods Bank", a travel agency, shoe repairs, jewellery repairs, the supply of school uniforms for more than 90 fee-paying schools, a golf school, livery stables, piano tuning, a wedding service, funeral undertakers, auctioneers estate agents and surveyors, a lending library,a post office, a theatre agency, a travel bureau, an insurance agency, house removals, dry cleaning, and opticians. In the days of the empire it fitted out children of parents living overseas for school in England, and could even be used to find a suitable school for a child; but these services have long been discontinued. It has from time to time introduced new products and services and discontinued others. It no longer supplies elephants.
And it does not and never has educated children. Some may be glad of that.

Unaccountably, to my mind, Sir Michael Kerr dissented. I can only refer you to his judgment in its totality but I cite the following:

The use of the adjectival form of their own name will become lost to the plaintiffs; but the false impression of a connection between the plaintiffs and unconnected businesses using the name "Harrodian" will proliferate. The plaintiffs' reputation will become involved with their fortunes or misfortunes, and become a hostage to them. In my view the plaintiffs have done nothing to deserve this detriment, nor the defendants this benefit.
It is not fair to judge this passage with the benefit of hindsight but it was absurd at the time and it remains absurd today.

The Harrodian School still exists (visit their site) and I cannot think that anyone associates it with the rather silly department store that shares part of its name.

I have not confirmed this with them but I do not believe that the Harrodian school has ever sold elephants or has any intention in the future of selling elephants. Elephants will not ever be available on this blog or my main site.

I will never ever compete with Harrods in any way or form. I promise you this, Mr Al Fayed. Please do not sue me.

Saturday, July 28, 2007

The Death Cat


Never let it be said that I do not report miracles.

Apart from the headline article you can view a typical Daily Mail response by, well, clicking on Daily Mail. I hope that will not be too confusing for Daily Mail readers. If it is then they can click here.

A cat's affinity for dying people is hardly unusual in a nursing home.

Cats are wonderful beings and so unlike dogs and humans. Their insouciance is unsurpassed by any other creature. They have an individuality and a complete disregard for man-made law that renders them supremely admirable. Yet, they are not wholly anarchistic and will be lovable and comforting to their human companions when it suits them.

It is the "when it suits them" bit about cats that dog-lovers hate. A dog will obey orders. A dog will fetch a stick but a cat will only fetch a small rolled up ball of silver paper if it happens to be in the mood for a game. If it is not then it will toss you a disdainful look indicating that the whole idea of this game at this time is simply beneath contempt. You will then end up apologising to the cat. No-one apologises to dogs.

Here, in Worthing, England, cats stroll across the road and if they see a car coming, they lie down in the middle of the road and start washing themselves. The car stops. The horn is tooted. Eventually, the cat gets up and strolls nonchalantly to the same side of the road it had come from.

It has made its point. Cats rule. Humans are merely servants or slaves to the cats' needs.

Tuesday, July 24, 2007

The case of the Right Honourable Gentlemen


NB: This is an old one just now made widely available on the BAIILI website.
There was an all star cast for this case including Lew Grade, Anthony Quayle, Coral Browne, Anna Massey and Corin Redgrave. Yes, the two separate branches of the acting profession combined here!

A Mr Littler thought he was being shafted when his four stars served notice to expire on the same day that they would be leaving, again on the same day 28 days later. It was accepted by the court that this would terminate this successful play.

Mr Grade (as he then was) represented all of the actors through one of his companies. All of the resignation letters were in essentially the same terms.

Mr Littler thought that it was a conspiracy to get him out of the theatre because Mr Grade wanted to move another play into the theatre.

Do you agree? I will not spoil the ending. Read this one.

Thursday, July 19, 2007

The Mad Barrister: You Must Read this Judgment

I read this judgment with incredulity.

It is the case of Stewart Dunn v Glass Systems (UK) Ltd

Mr. Dunn's antics are hilarious and it is very difficult to understand why anyone would ever instruct him.

His behaviour reminds me of the worst kind of litigant in person. The kind who get disqualified from pursuing further actions without leave of a High Court Judge.

But he is a barrister. And he is absurdly incompetent.

This is a judgment I recommend you to read. I have not the time this evening to provide selected extracts but may do so over the weekend.

Monday, July 16, 2007

Jobs for the Unemployable



I posted the following on the Sunday Times board about Boris Johnson running for mayor of London. There would appear to be no connection at all. A totally mad post, you may think. But you haven't read the article on young Boris. When you do you will have a greater insight into madness.
Those people who the PM most wants to find jobs for would appear to be the most unemployable and slothful and alienated, the least educated and the most delinquent.

Surely those who are slightly less ignorant and have only minor violent tendencies may wish to complain about this patent discrimination in favour of the abominable, apparently on the basis that they are more in need of improving. They have got further to go. A simple lesson then. Be worse and we might give you a job.
It is the PM who is mad, of course, not Boris. Boris is immensely entertaining and must run for mayor. Stuff his family. The nation needs a really entertaining electoral contest. It's nothing to do with politics. I could not care less who runs (or thinks they run) London. But, Boris trying to run anything would be a huge laugh. Think of all those wonderful pratfalls we are in store for!

DISCLAIMER: "Cretins" below does not refer to Boris but to the other nutter.

Lack of Posts

I have not been around in a while. I have a major learning curve to navigate = MYSQL and PHP. More another time.

Tuesday, July 03, 2007

Smoking and Freedom

I regard it as unadulterated nanny statism to ban smoking in pubs, and, god help us, on open air railway stations. It is also an attack on freedom. But, I do want to give up smoking and it may therefore be helpful to me personally. I am not going to want to spend a lot of time outside under shelters in the wind and rain.

The ban is unsupportable, though. This infingement of the liberty of the citizen cannot be justified. Nanny has become a dictator and good motives do not justify that.

Freedom must include the freedom to say unpopular things or to do unpopular acts or it is not really freedom. It is the dictatorship of the majority.

Freedom is about minority rights and upholding them. Freedom is about letting other people do or say things you dislike them doing or saying.

There were perfectly obvious other solutions that would have infringed no-one's rights. The simplest would have been a law that said that pubs with one bar should be non-smoking but that pubs with two or more bars could designate one of them as a smoking bar. In employment law it could have simply have been enacted that it would amount to discrimination to fail to employ bar staff who only wanted to work in a non-smoking environment.

It is legitimate to restrict freedom im in extreme circumstances (in the face of terrorism, for instance) but only so far essential, not merely expedient. To restrict freedom unnecessarily is both foolish and dictatorial which will be part of the Blair Legacy.

Friday, June 22, 2007

Devils' Dust Turns Gold

I have no comment. Just click the title and weep.

The rich shall prosper while commuters weep and perish.

Ah, well, I can run a better train company on Railroad Tycoon 3.

The Real Meaning of Religion


Let me tell you a story.

It begins like this:



That's the thief on the right. Well, it's one of them. The one he told would be in paradise with him that very same day. It could not be any other day because they were both about to die. And it could have been the one on the other side anyway. It is difficult to distinguish between thieves. If his hands had not been nailed in then I suppose he could have flipped a coin. But it's pretty easy for him to do that kind of stuff in his head. Gosh, I just tried it. I can flip a coin in my head!!! You get to come to paradise with me and, oh, you on the other side, your just dead.

But they are such nice people really:

Qualms about Freedom


Even my absolute opposition to censorship of any kind was jolted by the above video.

But, it was a momentary judder.

Freedom of speech is the Ace of Trumps. It triumphs over every other concern.

Thursday, June 21, 2007

Sarkozy: Drunk, Dizzy or Judged?


Judge not that thee be not judged. That was one of the guy's better sayings (whether he existed or not).

That journalists should judge Sarkozy takes, well, the biscuit. Actually, it takes a whole lorry load of biscuit tins.

Mind you, you have to eat quite a lot of biscuits to buy his running up the stairs explanation too. Maybe it wasn't beer.

Faith Central: An atheist's guide


Libby Purves, the seemingly nice rational person who presents interesting and intelligent programs on Radio 4, has a new religious blog. It is open to atheists but they have to be "grumpy" atheists.

Balderdash! Me, grumpy! I commented as follows:

"The plethora of religions justifies belief in the existence of an instinct to believe in something supernatural but renders extremely improbable the existence of a god to believe in.

The existence of astrologers and the many who read them does not indicate even a tiny probability that astrology is an accurate guide to any individuals' future.

Theists are caught in the same trap. That is why they must rely upon "faith". Faith is a way of ending rational argument. It is the Ace of trumps. Faith = "I believe in X. I can offer you no justification except that millions of others are equally deluded. However, X must be a true belief because I believe in X."

That theists cannot win rational arguments is demonstrated by their final answer: which is to kill you. Islamists are in the news but Christians used to do exactly the same thing."

One might add that many believers in astrology are also theists. They may have a "belief" gene i.e. they will believe in anything.

Not that I have anything against faith (properly regarded):

Tuesday, June 19, 2007

I have not bought The Satanic Verses but...


We only ban what we fear.

To threaten to kill the author takes it a step further.

I have tried to read a Rushdie book or two once (never twice). I did not get very far because they were not very good. They were too, well, Rushdie. Rushdie is, to my mind, a synonym for "boring".

He should not have been knighted. He's not a very good writer. Subject him to literary criticism by all means - even, if you have the willpower and patience, critically assassinate him. But, put a bullet in his brain because of Tony Blair's shallow literary taste! Come on!

All that has been achieved by renewal of the fatwa is to emphasise the degenerate nature of religious belief at its fundamentalist heart.

If further proof were needed that Dawkins is right, here it is. A god who believes in terrorism to enforce belief in himself is, hopefully, a contradiction in terms. But then, god is just that, a contradiction in terms.

Thursday, June 14, 2007

The Judge's Underpants


In executing a breathtakingly brilliant strategy, worthy of the late George Carman QC, Sir Stephen Richard's leading counsel persuaded Sir Stephen to display his old briefs to the judge.

David Fisher QC asked the eminent Court of Appeal judge (all Court of Appeal judges are by definition eminent):

“In order to remove your penis when you’re wearing your Calvin Klein briefs, is it necessary to use one or two hands?”

To this the judge memorably replied:

“If I had a pee, I would use two hands. It is the natural way of doing it.”
This reply was, of course, fatal to the prosecution case that the judge had exposed his penis twice to a lady on the London underground.

Game, Set and Match!

I understand that the Crown Prosecution Service are immediately revising their training manual to include a completely rewritten version of the chapter on Resisting the Underpants Defence.

American defense lawyers have beseiged the UK solicitors actiing for Sir Stephen.

Saturday, June 02, 2007

Mrs Charman in The Times (and in the money)


The interview with Mrs Charman reported in The Times is fascinating for family lawyers in many respects but I only want to focus on her extraordinary comment on pre-nuptial agreements.

"The wife who secured the biggest divorce award in British legal history backed the Court of Appeal judges over the need for prenuptial agreements.

Beverley Charman, 54, told The Times: 'I would definitely have one now and I would advise my sons to have them. But at the time we married we had no expectation of money.' "


Let me make absolutely sure that I have understood this:

(1) Does Mrs Charman mean that she would have agreed to a pre-nup, if Mr Charman had wanted one, before they married?

(2) Alternatively, does she only mean that she would want a pre-nup if she were to remarry?

She says "now" so I think the answer to (1) is probably:

Well, who knows, but I am bloody glad I didn't because I would not have this megafortune in the bank.

The answer to (2) would then be:

Absolutely yes. Do you think I want some passing fancy to walk off with my megafortune in the bank?

She then refers to her sons entering into pre-nups. Perhaps she is concerned about them marrying women like herself who are "not greedy"?

She conducted the interview at her solicitor's office. She may have been advised what to say. Who knows?

Whoever wrote the script, the only keyword thhat sums up this comment and, indeed, the whole interview, is hypocrisy - of the breathtaking variety.


"Lawyer apologises over TB flight scare"


This is a headline from the London Times of today's date.

Cynics amongst you will want to comment that the first two words of the title must be unique so far as truthful news reports are concerned.

This reminds me of a joke repeated several times in Michael Connelly's The Lincoln Lawyer (a real page-turner):

"What's the difference between a catfish and a lawyer?"

"One's a bottom-feeding shit sucker and the other one's a fish."


With minor variations this joke is available all over the internet so the ascription to Michael Connelly is hardly necessary but I still am enjoying his ingenious courtroom drama. I'm saving 50 or so pages for later.

Saturday, May 26, 2007

Richard Dawkins is God: Gosh! I've only just read The God Delusion

God prevented me from uploading this image of Himself correctly. It will be lightning bolts next!



I suppose he did not let me download or upload it because (a) fuck's sake, He's God or (b) it was a bad likeness or (c) copywright infringement or (d) he really is just a greenish panel of nothingness.
Those of you who believe (a) to be the correct answer may as well turn your monitors off. You are beyond redemption and beyond reason. Restarting the computer is probably too difficult for you, so I have kept it nice and simple. If you cannot find the button to turn off the monitor, pull the plug out of the wall and go to bed with a nice cup of chocolate. When you wake up, sell your computer. Knowledge and information are not things you need. Buy a PlayStation. I believe (without knowing and without having any evidence at all and, indeed, without caring whether there is any evidence) that they include a free game entitled "Suicide Bombers and the Ultra-Virgins". You will like it.
Those who answered (b) or (c) are only mildly less insane.
The correct answer was, of course, (d).
There is no God. Professor Dawkins has proved it.

Well, he didn’t really need to. The basic idea is obvious. Did he really need to write a whole book about it? Most of the book is either elaboration or written in support of his alternative explanation for life: Darwinian evolution. His alternative theories may be right (and they are certainly interesting) but you do not need to buy into the positive exposition to realise that the Christian, Jewish or Muslim “god” is an improbable explanation for life on earth.

The improbability of god is summed up in a three word question. Who created god? Once you realise the infinite regression this traps you into (Who created the being or thing that created the being or thing that created god?) no sane person can believe in god.

My school had a joint debating society with a nearby girls’ school. I ran it (essentially, this was the 70’s and the girls mostly just did as they were told - with the exception of my girlfriend: see below). I once held a debate on the existence of God and the utility (or otherwise) of Jesus as a role model. The headmistress of the local girls’ school forbade her pupils to even attend.

That’s right! She did not say “Go forth, and defend Jesus.” She simply did not want the pure little ears of “her girls” to be exposed to contrary opinions. As I remember it, she did not let them attend a debate on homosexuality either. So, god and gayness had a special status. You were not allowed (at least, her girls were not allowed) to dispute the given truths that god was good and gay was bad.

You probably think I am making this up and you will be reinforced in your belief if I tell you that the girls’ school was called Nonsutch School. OK, ye unbelievers go to their website and be justly smited for thy unbelief! And, one girl did turn up! Admittedly, she was my girlfriend at the time but she went to Nonsutch School and defied her headmistress.
I went to Sutton Manor High School (as it was briefly called in an attempted act of camouflage) or, as it is now proud to call itself, its original name, Sutton Grammar School.

I bet the headmistress in question would like me to give her a capital letter. She, dead or alive, does not deserve one (and that goes for god too), but my Headmaster does. Dr Walsh was a religious man and his doctorate was in science (I think, physics). But, although he suspended me on three occasions, he ignored reported sightings of me on the premises and was always a lively and interested participant in our personal debates (otherwise, my harangues, or, from his perspective, the disciplinary interviews).

Lots of (but, crucially, not all) theists act as if they are sane in other aspects of their lives.

It is the “not all” bit that justifies Professor Dawkins’ book and the time and trouble he took to write it.

Incidentally, he is also a very good writer and I have found it difficult to put down this book notwithstanding that I had other pressing matters requiring my immediate attention. That is about as good as it gets if you are looking for praise from me. But, of course, neither “god” nor Professor Dawkins will be even slightly interested in my opinion. On the other hand, at least one of them exists.

I am so convinced of his existence that I have pre-elected myself as High Priest of the cargo cult that will arise around Professor Dawkins' bones. So please address me as Your Holiness in future. Otherwise, Steven will do. But NOT Steve. I'll cast a spell on you if you call me Steve. And you know that, as the preemptive High Priest of the Church of Richard Dawkins, my spells work.


Saturday, May 19, 2007

Hendrix or Dylan?

All Along the Watchtower is a great song but whose version is best?

The Wicked Messenger


Cyberthiefs are exploiting the genuine Madeleine McCann website by typosquatting.

These disgusting bastards include, according to The Times, "chat rooms, estate agents and dating sites".

Click on the title to view The Times's article.

I am a bit surprised that chat rooms and dating sites should resort to this practice. The fact that estate agents are involved causes no surprise whatsover.

I have met one honourable estate agent so they should not all be tarred with the same brush.

Name & Shame: I will publish a list of these miserable bastards once I have verified their status.

Madeleine, Frankie Lee and the Judas Priest

The Internet has ensured that there is nowhere on the planet that Madeleine McCann's kidnapper can hide.

The outpouring of prayer and support across the globe is touching and brings tears to even the most hardened cynic's eyes.

But the doomsayer in me says that it may also have hastened Madeleine's death.

He (it is almost certainly a he) is now the most cornered rat of all time. As such, he will resort to desperate measures without analysing the consequences.

Even as a non-believer, I pray not. But does prayer have power? Madeleine McCann's fate may thus be God's ultimate test.

He may already have failed you. I pray not.

The picture above symbolises the most perfect of happy families. No-one but a sadistic pervert would seek to render it asunder. Unfortunately, the rat knows that and his instinct for self preservation may lead him into unthinkable territory.

The Ur-Prime Minister

Hasn't the boy done well?

Forget the troubles.

10 years a PM. That counts as a good innings. You gave it to him. Fast or slow, he can take the bowling.

He chooses his time of going. Gosh, he finishes "not out".

In fact, he is not out plus seven weeks in which he has a free passs to slog them all over the field. No-one is allowed to catch his balls during this period!

Alright, Let's Mention It - The DVLA Sex Scandal


It is important not to become obsessive. I have therefore resolved not to post anything about DVLA for, at least, say, another 24 hours.

There is more than one sex scandal associated with the DVLA. For instance, the tent girl.

They like it hot in Swansea.

Friday, May 18, 2007

The DVLA at NIght: Don't Mention the Sex Scandal













Does not this look nice? (Welsh word order). It is a much nicer photograph than the one in my previous post. That was a Kafkaesque gulag.


Here it is again:



Which of the pictures truly exemplifies the way the DVLA works?

(a) The carefully laquerred self portait; or

(b) Kafka's Castle.

Do not click on the title if you dislike scandalous sex stories.

Thursday, May 17, 2007

My Driving Licence, the DVLA and Diabetes


The good people at DVLA (the Driver Vehicle Licencing Authority in the UK) have revoked my driving licence following a minor road accident.

This is because I am a diabetic.

I should add that the police confirmed verbally on the day they would be taking no further action and subsequently confirmed this in writing. That is, not even the most minor road traffic offence (probably, driving without due care and intention - I am a civil litigator not a criminal lawyer) was to be brought, nor was I to be warned or cautioned.

The form I filled in for DVLA asked for details of my consultant and my General Practitioner. I (I think, reasonably) assumed that this meant that they would consult them before reaching a decision.

They did not. This was confirmed when I asked if they had received my fax enclosing a diabetic unit medical opinion following the accident. Apparently, it takes up to 72 hours for a fax to register on the system. It can take up to 15 days for an ordinary letter to register on the system.

They have twelve doctors and "thousands" of medical applications to deal with.

The letter informed me that I could appeal to the Magistrate's Court (months of delay) but, over the telephone, I was told that I could apply for a review.

This, I have done. I will post the results.

Wednesday, May 09, 2007

The Maypole Hole, the Hole in Mrs Cole's Pocket and the Compensation Culture


Mrs Yvonne Cole stepped in a disused hole designed to accomodate a maypole. Quite how serious her injuries were is not revealed by the Court of Appeal judgment as the value of her claim has not been considered. Proceedings had been confined to liability.

She won in Brighton County Court.

The Royal British Legion appealed to the Court of Appeal and won.

Read their judgments (and weep) by clicking on the title.

The pastoral meanderings worked for Lord Denning but they do not work now. A lot of crap about village greens determined the law on this one.

Thursday, April 26, 2007

Divorcing Reality: The Website

The Divorcing Reality website now exists. There is much more content yet to be uploaded but a working design has been achieved and some content is there.

Saturday, March 24, 2007

Saturday, March 17, 2007

Sally Clark is Dead: Let the Libel Begin



Our beloved professional experts now have something to trouble their consciences. Well, not really. Nothing much does seem to trouble those consciences.

When my firm could afford to do legal aid work I did a number of child care cases and the thing that really troubled me was the dispassionate approach of the so-called experts.

"Dispassionate" sounds like a word you would want applied to your "approach" as a "professional". It is different for each professional involed:

The Lawyer for the Parent

Not so for lawyers involved in this kind of work. What you need is a solicitor who is "involved" and "passionate" but also one who can stand back and be "objective".

It is a big ask and I have unbounded admiration for those of my colleagues who still do this kind of work in spite of goernmment restrictions on legal aid. (As a side note, I may hold the record for resigning from franchises with the Legal Services Commission in that I have done it twice).

The Social Workers

I can only speak from personal experience as a lawyer who used to represent parents. I am biassed.

Social Services (the "SS") tend in my view to live up to their acronym.

They intervene on a lottery basis (there may be many worse families in the same street who do not attract their attention) but once they have done so they hang on like terriers. Nothing you can say will detract from their certainty that they are right.

The Local Authority Lawyers

Poorly paid and overworked as they are they should not do as, in my experience, they do do.

They are the ciphers of their colleagues in the SS. They inherit all the bad traits and contribute nothing. They are the prime examples of lawyers acting as mere "mouthpieces".

Tuesday, February 20, 2007

Are Police Officers Attractive?


This is a direct quote from The Times and I cannot improve upon it by further comment. It is by Jack Malvern:

Two police officers who were asked to leave a pub for exuberant kissing were criticised by a magistrate for turning a drunken row into a police matter.

Nicola Stewart and Lisa Curchun, her girlfriend, both police constables, were asked to leave by Nicola Hackett, the landlady of The Old Cock Inn, in April last year. The pair reported Ms Hackett to their colleagues, who charged her with a public order offence. Penny Williams, presiding at St Albans Magistrates Court, cleared Ms Hackett and noted that the policewomen and two companions, who acted as witnesses for the prosecution, had drunk a “fair amount of alcohol” that night.

Ms Hackett said: “I can’t have my customers made to feel uncomfortable by public displays of passion, by gay or heterosexual couples."

Thursday, February 15, 2007

Veronica Connolly's Right to Free Speech


Is Veronica Connolly's right to free speech infringed if she is convicted of sending malicious communications by posting pictures of aborted foetuses to pharmacists as a protest against their providing the morning after pill?

The court has, so far, ruled not. I say "so far" because it is believed there will be an appeal of today's decision.

One thing only is clear about this case. There should be an appeal. Today's decision has unsatisfactory aspects that need to be clarified at a higher level; eventually, perhaps, by the European Court of Justice.

For instance, Lord Justice Dyson said this:

In my judgment, the persons who worked in the three pharmacies which were targeted by Mrs Connolly had the right not to have sent to them material of the kind that she sent when it was her purpose, or one of her purposes, to cause distress or anxiety to the recipient. Just as members of the public have the right to be protected from such material (sent for such a purpose) in the privacy of their homes, so too, in general terms, do people in the workplace. But it must depend on the circumstances. The more offensive the material, the greater the likelihood that such persons have the right to be protected from receiving it. But the recipient may not be a person who needs such protection. Thus, for example, the position of a doctor who routinely performs abortions who receives photographs similar to those that were sent by Mrs Connolly in this case may well be materially different from that of employees in a pharmacy which happens to sell the "morning after pill". It seems to me that such a doctor would be less likely to find the photographs grossly offensive than the pharmacist's employees. To take a different example, suppose that it were Government policy to support abortion. A member of the Cabinet who spoke publicly in support of abortion and who received such photographs in his office in Westminster might well stand on a different footing from a member of the public who received them in the privacy of his home or at his place of work.

Can a right to free speech be limited or varied according to the audience?

Article 9 of the Human Rights Convention provides specific protection of the right to freedom of thought, conscience and religion and the right to express those views.

Article 9(2) essentially allows restrictions where they are for the protection of the rights and freedoms of others.

Article 10 provides protection of a more general right to freedom of expression i.e. not resticted to the more specic matters in Article 9 (although, given the inclusion of the word "thought" in Article 9, you may have difficulty thinking up examples where both articles are not engaged simultaneously).

Article 10(2) includes a similar reference to the rights of others as does 9(2) but is qualified by the important distinction that the limitation must be necessary in a democratic society.

This, to me, is the key. I am a fairly old fashioned believer in free speech. You can say anything you like. This should be subject only to the laws relating to defamation but these only create private rights of action that should not restrict you from saying what you want to say in the first place (at your own risk) and not a criminal sanction*. That is the core concept in defining a democratic society. It is so fundamental that this decision must be appealed and that is totally regardless of Veronica Connolly's views about abortion and the morning after pill and whether or not you do or do not agee with them.

This is an important case and you can read it here.

*Yes I am aware that we have a law relating to criminal libel. How many prosecutions, annually, do you think there are?

Tuesday, February 13, 2007

PMOS on Road Pricing

You need to know that a PMOS is a Prime Minister's Official Spokesman - something like, but not much like, Tony Blair's representative in this dimension. Why the PMOS was allocated this humiliating acronym (pronounce it) is anybody's idea but looks and sounds very much like a Civil Service internal joke against the PM. Of course, it could just be incompetence.
Asked if he still thought that e-petitions were a good idea, and what numbers would have to be reached before Government put its hand up and retreated, the PMOS replied that it was always a good idea when there was a lively political debate. We had always recognised that there was a lively debate around transport as it was an issue that directly affected people's lives. Therefore, the livelier the debate, the better. But the debate in itself would not produce a solution. The crucial point about this issue was that doing nothing was not an option.
What he missed:

A petition is not a "lively political debate". In fact, it resembles a lively political debate about as much as a bendy bus resembles a red squirrel. The bendy bus and the squirrel are both red (but not quite the same shade). So, signing a petition and expressing an opinion are both indicators of viewpoint (but not quite in the same way).

Pressing some keys to register on a petition probably (but does not necessarily) require you to be alive (you could have set your computer to autofill before you died) but it certainly does not require you to be "lively" or to engage in any kind of "debate".

What he meant:

"We have to pretend that you are a nice bunch of sentients, and flatter you a bit, but we don't mean it and we are going to ignore your trivial attempts to resemble us."

The reality:

There is, however, a resemblance between a PMOS and a PM and one which they share with both the bus and the squirrel. They are all "bendy".

He is also reported as follows:

Put to him that we could not just ignore this petition if it got to 2 or 3 million names, the PMOS replied that it was not a matter of numbers.
What he missed:

When it comes election time, it most certainly is "a matter of numbers".

What he meant:

"This petition thingy was thought up by a pratt who has now been reassigned to dustbins and I do not mean that he is engaged on high policy issues concerning refuse collection and recycling. He is emptying them."

The reality:

This policy represents a nasty piece of paper that the government intends to place in the nearest dustbin as soon as everyone's back is turned.

One last report of what the PMOS said:


Asked if the Prime Minister thought that cannabis use was a bar to becoming Prime Minister, the PMOS replied that the journalist was trying to invite him, not very subtly, into political debate. He may have lost his voice at Croke Park yesterday, but he had not entirely lost his mind.

What he missed:

The use of "not entirely" suggests that the PMOS is only a bit mindless. Surely a fit for purpose PMOS should have an entire mind? Did the Civil Service Board miss something or is it just what happens when you become a PMOS? Do you have to volunteer or are PMOS's appointed? Do all the eligible civil servant's quickly find cupboards to hide in and the idiot who can't find a cupboard gets appointed? We need to know. Without this information it is completely impossible to judge the culpability of this particular PMOS or just how egregious the PMOS is. A public inquiry seems to be an immediate necessity.

What he meant:

"I'm out of mind on drugs. Why else would I be standing here in front of you?"

The reality:

The PMOS has a partner, four children, a cat and a huge mortgage. Bearing in mind that civil servants are unemployable in the private sector unless they are perceived to retain departmental influence, the PMOS needs to keep the job at any cost. The PMOS also does not relish emptying dustbins.

Conclusion:

Peeing on moss is what the dear old CS does best! They identify a futile activity, form a committee to decide whether to do it, decide after long and costly deliberation to do it, expend minimal effort, fail utterly and charge us on the basis that, well, it might have been a good idea.

Monday, February 12, 2007

Law: The Rules of the Game, the House Rules and the Big Casino

Daniel Finkelstein of The Times has posted a new competition that lets you get to play at being a rule-maker. Just click the title to play and you are an instant Parliamentary Draftsman.

Lawyers love rules. Not only do we have thousands of statutes; we then have procedural rules, with lots of commentary and case law on those.

No litigator leaves the office to go to court without volume 1 of the White Book (this not only contains the Civil Procedure Rules but lots and lots of commentary and case references).

The bare bones of the CPR can be found here but you will not really be equipped to engage in the fine art of legal combat unless you acquire a copy of the White Book.

Volume 2 is taken out for a walk less often because:

  1. the lawyer does not wish to risk a finding of contributory negligence for carrying too much weight should he trip over or fall down any stairs and want to sue someone; and,


  2. his opponent is less likely to refer to something in volume 2 that he or she is not already aware of (it is largely a collection statutes etc. already available elsewhere); and,


  3. hernias are bad for one's practice. NB: women can get hernias as well as men.

Each volume is bigger than the average house brick, and weighs as much or more, so they are a clear and present danger to anyone who carries them around. I suppose they could also be useful as a weapon of defence. Also, they do not carry the same risk of being had up for going equipped as you might if you were carrying an actual house brick.

But lawyers love the White Book. Assiduous study of its many thousands of pages of procedural law (printed on thin paper and with the notes printed in tiny type) have won many a case. The main use is therefore as a weapon of offence. Not by throwing it but by being aware of its contents.

The notes in the White Book keep lawyers employed. Years of training are necessary to understand these procedural rules (!) and the arcane and delphic utterances of the Court of Appeal and the House of Lords upon what they might or might not mean lead to the conclusion that, since they (the Lords and the Lords Justices of Appeal) cannot agree, I might have been right so you cannot get me for negligence if I advise you the wrong way.

Well, you might pot me - given what I have said above - but every other lawyer is safe.

"Put your money on red," I might have said. I might have explained to you that there was a limited chance of the ball hitting black (given the current state of the case law) and virtually no chance of a green (zero or double zero). In a casino I would have given you different advice. I would have told you that it was entirely random. I would have told you that there was no such thing as the law of averages.

Casino type advice is now required by our pro-active judges who demand that we practice clairvoyance rather than law and nowhere more so than in the family courts. I will post further about these anathema on another occasion.